The Wonder of Five Years


“Words are like nets – we hope they’ll cover what we mean, but we know they can’t possibly hold that much joy, or grief, or wonder.”
–Jodi Picoult

My little wonder rode into my world on an unexpected cloud. The cloud was dark and scary and for many days and weeks I was afraid of it. I was afraid because I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt at any given moment the precious cloud could burst, and my Little Wonder would be gone forever.

In fact, I was so certain I would lose him, I had no enjoyment of the respite a cloud can give on a scorching hot day or the beauty found when the sun’s rays stretch through a cloud and touch the earth with warmth. I lived each day in fear and dread.

When the unavoidable (and in many ways unanticipated) time came for delivery, even then I was overwhelmed by fear. Until I held the Little Wonder in my arms and looked into his precious face, my soul was dark and fearful at what I was certain would prove to be another profound loss in my life.

But the moment my Little Wonder opened his eyes and looked deeply into mine, I knew my life would never be the same again. Those dark blue eyes looked at me with love and curiosity and need.

And I knew.

I knew I would be there every single day of his life encouraging him and loving him and enjoying him simply because he breathes.

Five years later, he never ceases to amaze me. Most days his constant questions, his insatiable appetite to know all things, his passion for life and excitement at even mundane chores fill me with hope and joy; some days, they just completely wear me out.

Every single day, I am grateful.

I am grateful for my remarkable Little Wonder who rode into my life on the a cloud of grief and despair but has brought me only sunshine and joie de vivre. Happy Birthday Little Wonder. You are loved.

“To see a World in a Grain of Sand
And a Heaven in a Wild Flower,
Hold Infinity in the palm of your hand
And Eternity in an hour.”
–William Blake



About cjpjordan

A poet, a writer, an artist, a thinker, a musician and occasionally a skeptic, when I'm not teaching or traveling, I love to read and write and play the ukelele. I'm loving life with my Little Wonder--his energy and joy for life is contagious. He makes me believe and hope again. I don't want to forget these moments that pass so quickly so I have decided to write them down for posterity and for you to enjoy.
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